Relationships, Physics, and Dating

It is said that Heisenberg discovered his famous uncertainty relation as he was having trouble with intimacy because whenever he was in the act of lovemaking, he could not find the right momentum with the correct position and similarly whenever he had the time he could not find the energy and vice versa. Physical touch and sex, to be blunt, are some of the most important and critical things human beings focus on in their development. In childhood and adolescence, many men and women form their interpretations of relationships and what their love languages are, ranging from spoken words of affirmation to quality time spent together. What is common to all these physical relationships is the interaction, which at the end of the day, is something built beyond the situation. It is a connected diagram of many components, a village, a complex adaptive system, a team, family planning, and somehow, a working couple.

At the risk of sounding like a humanist, even though the Renaissance and Enlightenment are humanistic endeavors, the sexual revolution of humanity has changed from simian dominance in multi-male multi-female culture to a world of feminism, trad lifestyles, media control, and the hard question of complicity. To be honest, relationships and sex are parts of the human condition and there is no way to experiment on these social phenomena as they are happening in an ever changing and evolving ecosystem. The complex adaptive system that is the political socio-economic landscape is defined not just by the weather and the rainfall in the West; the consensus reality builds the environmental interaction. Conservatives and liberals agree on efficiency and for that reason, many relationships are built upon an economy. The slippery slope is that of quantifying and objectifying sex, which has somehow become less of a romantic vision, and more of a transaction.

Dating is by far, one of the most complex, intriguing, dissappointing, confusing, and mystifying experiences of the modern human. There is the etiquette, ranging from the get to know you meet and greet to the interview question and answer phase. As a scientist, dating is also appraoched with the Heisenberg philosophy. Meet at a place at a certain time. There is the position. Have energy that matches your partner. Generate a second date. There is momentum again. It, of course, is abstract. Frequency of dating too, is important. It is like an experiment. There are results, conclusions, post game analysis, and future directions. There is a lot to unpack.

Friends are similar to dates but I was told to not hit on your friends. I think friends are there to support you and be with you through your tough times, rejections, and heartache, and then again in your successes, your good relations, and your eventual wedding if you choose to conform to marriage philosophy. Friends are what brings us up to the world where we can create social organization and alliances which then attract mates.

In our system of modern society, we have a world of rights and privileges. This must change. Rights to a person sound a lot like a modern form of slavery. Privileges, I understand, come from the sort of spoiled brat world you build for your someone so that you can woo them into a sense of romantic love. A privilege is a sort of social contract and when the cheating happens in a commitment, the privilege is this vain and out of control system that turns society in a rigid hegemony of oppression. Don't cheat is my main point.

A long time from now, the world will likely have vastly different views of relationships. Maybe online dating will become the norm. No one will go to a bar. People might not even dance. Who knows. I think we'll have multi-generational multi-family homes in a complex hybrid residential-commercial-industrial mixing where the community is built into less commuting and more work from home. The changing environment (COVID, IoT, smartphones, etc.) of the world has led to a sort of inwardness and introversion. Architects must adapt and create spaces for interworking and life beyond the traditional office and the traditional home. Countries, states, nations, and firms of the future will have to conform to the new it/this/these normal behaviors that might have been rewarded for their sort of situational awareness and shock-troop like approach.

The future is something that no one can predict, yet we are biological creates ruled by our enzymes, our neurotransmitters, and our ecology. We live in an ecosystem and in a universe or a multiverse dominated by the need to propagate. Politics and genetics, rights and privileges, biology and physics, will all lead to better books and television, more interesting academic discussions about love and dating, and hopefully a world where more people find beauty, peace, intimacy, harmony, and a scientific relationship with their special someone. I believe there is someone out there for everybody. We have to fight the toxicity of hate and bring the world together.